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Are you a Violet who needs a Corky? Or do you want to be Corky?

I always talk about shaking up my look. I look like your average semi-corporate good girl. But lately I’ve been craving loads of black eyeliner, piercings and tattoos. Oh and possibly shaving a section of my waist-length hair. Just because.

I was at Brooklyn’s Metropolitan bar and all the women I thought were the most attractive were edgy…with loads of black eyeliner, piercings, tattoos and asymmetrical haircuts. “You like tough girls,” my friend pointed out. That’s  when I realized…I don’t know if I’m attracted to tough girls or if I want to BE a tough girl.

Shane from L Word Pictures, Images and Photos

Do you want to feel Shane today or do you want to feel up Shane today? It's a pretty tough call.

It makes sense that people would be attracted to people who have qualities they admire. Some women are drawn to the man who is the life of the party or has a great sense of humor. But this is a more multi-layered problem for gays. Do you want to make out with the girl who’s the center of attention or do you want everyone’s eye on you? Do you want to make out with the girl in the gray knit cap or do you want to steal it when she takes it off and goes to the bathroom?

Here’s a quiz I’ve devised so you can figure out if you are genuinely into your crush or  if you want to jack her swag.

1. You look over at your crush, she’s talking to another girl. You think:

a. Oh man, the girl she’s talking to is super hot.

b. I’m soooo much cuter than that girl.

c. Threesome anyone?

2. You and your crush strike up a conversation, she keeps making you crack up. You think: 

a. I WISH I had jokes like that!

b. She’s so funny, she would write great vows for our wedding.

c. ZOMG, you’re so funny it’s making me take my top off.

3. Your crush is on the dance floor with her friends, you go over and: 

a. Challenge her to a dance off.

b. Use your smile to lure her over to you and then impress her with your dance moves.

c. Grind with her then turn around and do the Jersey Turnpike.

Do you think we're starting to look too much alike?

If you got mostly A’s: You’re a swacker! You want to be this girl, not date her. If you two dated, you would become that lesbian couple that dresses the same and starts looking the same and that’s just so weird. Just be friends with her okay?

Mostly B’s: Congrats! It’s a real crush. Now go out there and try not to bring a U-haul or a cat to the second date.

Mostly C’s: You’re kinda slutty. I like that, lez be friends.

Have any of you ever had this problem? Is it worse for lesbians? Do you think you can want to be like someone and still be genuinely into pursuing a relationship with them?