Tags
boi, Cat Cora, Elizabeth Faulkner, hot, Iron Chef, Iron Chef America, lesbian, LGBT, Queer, reality tv, The Food Network, The Next Iron Chef, TV
Holiday FAIL? I haz it
It’s been awhile hasn’t it? I hope you all are surviving the holiday season a little better than Hot Femme has. Anyway, besides my guilt over not having my tree up and not yet calling back the many relatives who I’m lucky enough to have love me, I’ve been thinking about something…GAY. Shocking right?
I rarely get crushes on celebrities, they’re so girly. I’m sure that a lot of femmes have the same problem I have. It’s not that I don’t think celebrities aren’t beautiful, it’s just that I don’t want to sleep with them. Just like I don’t get crushes on straight women in everyday life, most celebrities don’t give me a lady boner. I like girls who look like boys. Long flippy hair, cleavage and mile long eyelashes don’t do it for me. I can’t fantasize about Shane from The L Word and Rachel Maddow forever.
Ok...so I can crush on Rachel forever BUT a girl needs some variety
So ladies, want to know the hot new boi in town? Chef Elizabeth Falkner.
You're Welcome. (image via http://www.thefoodnetwork.com)
Chef Falkner has been on my radar for a few years actually. I first noticed the bleach blond pastry chef when she started appearing on Food Network Challenges. The problem? She made crazy avant garde ‘desserts’ that didn’t look very appetizing and that doesn’t get my kitchen very hot. But as of this week she was the runner up on The Food Network’s Next Iron Chef competition and bitch should have won. The combination of ‘boi’ + ‘incredible talent’ + ‘food’ = too hot for words.
Team Falker! (image via http://www.thefoodnetwork.com)
Faulkner lost the competition, which broke my heart. Not only because I was THIS CLOSE to seeing her on TV every week, but because if she had won she would have replaced out chef Cat Cora. Cora was the only female Iron Chef and one of my fave celesbians. Cora left “Iron Chef” without any explanation, but I would assume that her skyrocketing career and four children probably had something to do with her decision to leave the show.
Did I mention how hot Cat is?
Even hotter when she does shots at the end of each battle
Erm, I guess to sum up this post: There was almost a really hot boi on TV for you to oogle every week, instead of the stereotypical hotties that Hollywood churns out like Happy Meals. But, if you would like to oogle Chef Falkner from the privacy of your own computer, you can check her out here: http://elizabethfalkner.com/bio.html
Don’t say I never gave you anything! So what do you think, is Chef Falkner hot or not?
Hot Femme in the City 
Well, she’s attractive but I like the girly girls. Does that make me a boi? Or am I too old to be a boi? I loved this. Your blogs are awesome. Lady boner, lol. That book is not far behind.
I actually would call you a boi. And you’re not too old for anything! 😉
Not. My. Type. She’s all yours crush-wise. Yet, I’m very impressed with her culinary credentials. She sounds like a fantastic chef and I would love to eat at Orson. Maybe I’ll check it out when I’m in SF, but it might be one of those impossible-to-get-into places or maybe I’ll fail the cool code.
You? Fail the cool code? Impossible.
not my type, I like the femmes 😉 but I do love your humor!! Great post!
Thanks babe! 🙂
She looks a little like Annie Lennox dontcha think? I have a hard time making room for celebs in my fantasies. Ditto Cindy on loving your blogs tho… and your chewy comments too! ♥
She DOES look like Annie Lennox! Haha.
Who is there room for in your fantasies? 😉
There’s a quirky blonde girl who shows up in my dreams ALL the time. She’s kind of my Idgie and she’s pretty much got a lock on my fantasies. If I had to make room for someone else…? Well, let’s see, I’m a sucker for long dark hair and a smart sense of humor so… um… someone like… you?
Idgie!! How sweet! If there’s room save it for me 😉
CLAIM TICKET
This ticket entitles the bearer to the next available spot in Annie’s fantasies and shall be honored upon presentation. No other restrictions apply.
Issued 12/19/2011 to: Natasiarose
Score!
From one femme to another I respect your boicrush. And I haven’t seen her in action. But she looks a bit delicate for a boi. Does she swagger?
Finally! Hmmm…there’s a little bit of swagger. She’s confident & that’s always hot.
hahahahaha claim tickets on fantasies. [That] is so choice. (Name the movie!)
Also, Shane? YES.
A fabulous post, as ever.
Mean Girls?? Thanks babe 🙂
I’m a “girly femme” totally smitten with a very “girly femme” sweetie all my own so she’s definitely all yours. 😉
…. Now…. if she had amazingly pretty dark eyes, soft flippy hair… and knew kung-fu….. I might just have to let my imagination toy with the idea a while… Hehehehe!!
…. I’m just sayin”…. 😉
Erm…I totally know kung Fu! 😛
We have different taste in bois for sure. Haha.
I find Rachel most attractive of those pictured in your post.
Rachel is crazy dreamy 😉
Hot!!!!!!!!! There’s also Chef Susan Feniger – google her name and images – you’re welcome. And of course Chef and cookbook author Virginia Willis. My current crush is Mary Riley, another chef, probably old enough to be my mother, oops…
Big on the chef crushes over here. In case you hadn’t noticed…
I love Chef Feniger! She’s an adorable little Tamale! We totes have Chef crushes in common. 🙂
Oh those glasses, that smile, that hair, those orange high tops…. suchahappysigh…
Rachel looks like my friend Ben! LOL. I go for the more feminine girls myself…or like the girl next door who babysat you when you were a kid. I like boobs and hair can’t help it! 🙂 I would say though that Cat is sexy!
Cat is sexy! I think she looks femme but has some masculine energy in there. Yum!
You do know I have a thing for chefs, right? Cat = yes. Elizabeth = hmm, a little attraction/intrigue. I can see the appeal. She seems intense. I think I would want to dress her up in femme-y clothes, tho! 😉 I have a feeling that Elizabeth wouldn’t be too keen on this idea.
Noooo femmey clothes! That’d totally ruin it for me. Take Cat instead! 😉