Vintage Interview: Hunter Valentine

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gay, hot girls, hot lesbians, Hunter Valentine, Interview, Kiyomi, lesbian, LGBT, music, Queer, rock band, rock music, Showtime, The Real L Word

Hunter Valentine circa May 2010, from left to right: Laura, Kiyomi, Adrienne

Two years ago, a younger, stupider, more optimistic Hot Femme was trying to make her living as a full time blogger. Silly Hot Femme, everyone knows writers can’t make money on the internet! Anyway, the reason I’m bringing this up is because my very first video interview was with the rock band, Hunter Valentine. In 2010 the band was made up of Kiyomi, Laura and Adrienne, three incredibly hot, incredibly talented queer girls. Which honestly was enough, at the time, to make me nervous.

They totally thought I was some kind of legit journalist or whatever until the interview started and it was clear I was nervous and had no idea what I was doing. I can’t even watch this video now, because of how horrendous it was. BUT in light of finding out that Kiyomi is now starring on the upcoming season of The Real L Word, I thought I would bring this interview back. Snarking on The Real L Word launched my bloggy career, so I kind of owe the show. Just a little bit. Interview below, enjoy!

Ask the Femme: The Real L Word Edition

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ask the femme, bisexual, Celebrities, femme, friends, lesbian, lesbians, LGBT, Queer, reality tv, Sex, Stereotypes, The Real L Word, trashy, TV

This is the way, it's the way that we...lie topless in a heap?

I get a lot of questions about The Real L Word. Even though I only watched two or three episodes of season two, I devoted about 100 hours to thought, discussion and recapping the first season. Also, Rose from season one called me a bitch on Facebook and Nikki and Jill second that emotion, which means I’m still qualified to answer your questions. I’ve compiled a list of my most popular Real L Word questions into one post, for your convenience. Let us continue to beat this dead beaver into the cold, cold ground.

Are the Real L Word girls on Facebook?

Yes, yes they are.

Mikey is probably the only person in this picture who wouldn't punch me in the face. So she's my fav.

Can I friend them?

You can try, but most of them are at or are close to the 5000 friend limit or value their privacy. Many of them have fan Facebook pages, where you can “like” them and keep on top of their comings and goings and sometimes see pics of them naked/in bikinis. Yay!

Are they on Twitter?

Yes, google search their names plus twitter and it will pop up. I would list it for you but I’m lazy.

Can you tell me what Whitney’s tattoo’s mean?

No, see above lazy comment.

Do you have any pictures of Whitney lying down naked?

Fuck yea #Romiboobs!

Um no. How would I get those?! I don’t have any personal pictures of any of the women. You can try to get your own by going to one of the queer parties they frequent. One of my readers even saw boobs.

How do the girls on The Real L Word have sex?

Dude, you are obvs a str8 person who wants me to describe lesbian sex to you. just watch the show! They will show you how they do it. You don’t need to hear it from me or any other lesbian. Please, never ask a lesbian you meet in real life this question, it’s really insulting/annoying/creepy.

What do lesbians think of The Real L Word?

Dear Str8 Person- this is a completely reasonable and respectful question to ask. Thanks for restoring my faith in humanity. Okay, I can’t speak for everyone. From what I see, most younger (teen-20ish) lesbians love it and aspire to live it. The 25-35 bracket loves to hate it and when we are at our worst, we can admit that sometimes…it is disturbingly accurate of all the crazy. The 35plus bracket is too smart to watch this crap.

Maybe if Natalie had come back for season 2, I would have watched.

I have to admit that I love trashy reality TV and I’m addicted to it like a mofo. The first season of The Real L Word lagged in terms of interesting storylines and for some reason the second season just didn’t keep my attention. I can’t pinpoint the exact reason why.

My main problem with the show is that I don’t like that it shows the full blown act of sex. Most reality shows just imply it, but for some reason, the lone lesbian reality TV show has explicit porno scenes. In the original series, “The L Word,” there is a scene where Jenny’s book, “Les Girls” is being made into a movie. The str8 male director wants the actresses to actually have real sex, instead of just simulating it, like most movies. Jenny and Tina are disgusted, roll their eyes and nix the idea. Maybe Ilene Chaiken forgot about that scene, as she is the creator of both series. It’s great to have representation on TV, but we aren’t being treated like everyone else and that really grinds my gears.

If you have any Real L Word comments or questions, get them out of your system in the comments!

The Top 5 Misconceptions Straight People Have Because of the Real L Word

Tags

Dating, Hats, lesbian, Love, Sex, Stereotypes, Tats, The Real L Word, TV

The DVD image for The Real L Word is Scissors...homo they didn't.

It’s Real L Word Season! The second season of this groundbreaking reality show starts June 5th on Showtime. It’s been great for lesbian visibility…but I’m beginning to think that it’s giving straight people the wrong impression. It’s impossible for any show to capture the diversity that exists in our community. So lets take a chill pill and laugh at some of the stereotypes that can be drawn from the franchise we love to hate and hate to love!

1) 90% of all lesbians are hair/makeup artists. How the hell did Illene Chaiken even find so many lesbian hair/makeup artists? Alyssa, Whitney, Romi, Sara, Raquel, etc. Apparently, that’s the field to get into if you want to be a trendy lez.

2) We all have tattoos, at least a half sleeve. I have none! But everyone in the Real L Word universe seems to have millions. The end credits should include the names of their tattoo artists. I’m looking for a good one.

3) Lesbians love hats. This is especially true in the upcoming season of the show. Romi is rocking a pork pie, Cori loves her ascot, Sara only wears bowlers and a smile and Whitney will put anything on her head. Ok fine, maybe this one is actually true.

4) We love having sex on camera! For everyone to see! Sorry to burst your bubble straight male popular. We actually don’t.

5) We don’t have straight girlfriends. Actually we do! They are great because we can’t sleep with them and complicate our lives. So next time you see a lesbian say hi, we are a friendly peoples.

Did I leave anything out? What other misconceptions do you think people have because of the Real L Word?

The Hate Mail and I

Tags

Celebrities, Hate, Hate Mail, LeAnn Rimes, Real Housewives, Tammy Lynn Michaels-Etheridge, The Real L Word

I get a lot of hate mail. As an entertainment blogger, I make it my MO to make fun of celebrities. Most of the time I keep it light and funny but sometimes I kick them when they are down. It usually doesn’t matter too much, if you have enough money you are always going to win. So I don’t usually feel too guilty. I stay away from trainwrecks like Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan. Their lives have evolved into some thing sadder than the fluffernutter articles I regularly put out into cyberspace.

My writing results in one of four reactions.
1) I get a ton of readers. The meaner, snarkier, more willing to call someone out on their BS I am, the more readers I get.
2) Readers love me. I say what they are thinking! We get it, we connect. This is why I write.
3) Readers hate me. We all have our favorite celebrities and varying degrees of loyalty to them. When readers leave me hateful comments or send me angry messages on Facebook, it makes me sad. I’m so sensitive! That’s why I write about celebrities instead of trying to be one! My publisher and other writers love hate comments. They love the challenge, they love the back and forth. I’ve been called every name in the book and maybe I deserve it…but I hate reading it and it’s slowly getting to me. I have had to take breaks from reading comments in the past, so that I don’t ruin my day.
4) I’ve gotten chastised by certain celebrity handlers and once in blue, by the celebrities themselves.

LeAnn Rimes tweeted about me. Tammy Lynn Michaels-Etheridge wrote me a poem and threatened to mail her her thong. PR people for Real Housewives and even State Senators have told me to cut it out and not all cute like Full House Uncle Joey style. Like stop. Now. Stop now or someone is going to call a lawyer kind of stop.

“That’s great!” is the usual reaction that people give me when I tell them how much I have pissed someone famous off. “You’re going to be the next Perez Hilton! This could be your break.” Only it never is my break and I lack the type of follow through needed. I could have jumped harder on LeAnn, could have ridden her like a pony into the sunset of 15 minute infamy. But that’s not really what I want to be known for. It isn’t who I think I am. When I’m caught up in the moment and I write something that makes me laugh so hard I do a spit take, I put it out there. I want the world to see it and laugh with me, even if we are laughing at someone else.

My latest mini-celeb showdown is with Nikki from the first season of Showtimes “The Real L Word.” When previewing the show, I threw in this two liner just for fun.

This year is going to kick last year’s butt. Gone are the older, mature partners in anorexia  and life (Sorry Jill! You aren’t gay! Sorry Nikki, you’re boring!) [Source]

You know what’s not fun? That Nikki actually read it. I have an unread Facebook message from her sitting in my inbox. She wrote in the subject line, “The boring anorexic married to “not gay” Jill.” Ouch. I’m a bitch.

I can’t bring myself to read it. I can’t read it because I feel bad that I hurt her feelings and because I can’t give her what she wants, which is probably an apology. I can’t give it because I’m not sorry, I mean it. Maybe I can’t read it because my reaction to her hate mail says too much about me and what I’m capable of. A woman who doesn’t know me is making me face the fact that I frequently dance across the line between funny and cruel and have surprisingly little remorse for it.

Maybe she’s right and maybe…just maybe…she needs a sandwich.